There's nothing you can do to force someone to behave. So, she asked me to enter 80 more hours that month, and then I would subtract those hours from the following months timesheet. 10 Difficult Life Situations and How to Get Through It Remember, most of these situations are not under our control. Instead, you maintained your cool. . However, our brains have developed to protect us, even when objectively we can tell that we are in no danger. Some of us are wired for anxiety and worry, and some have a more laissez . In my first team meeting at ABCD Corporation, my manager told a couple of prejudiced jokes. If necessary, use phrases such as this is not a good time for me to talk, or lets deal with this after we cool off to buy yourself time. Remember, they are probably being rude because they're angry or upset about something that they're going through. Holding the warm beverage cup in your hand can elevate your mood as well. In this situation, you may either try to avoid giving your presentation, give your presentation but show signs of agitation and anxiety or try to give your presentation and freeze up. Yokogoshi H, Kobayashi M, Mochizuki M, Terashima T. Effect of theanine, r-glutamylethylamide, on brain monoamines and striatal dopamine release in conscious rats. Given that definition, not all stress is bad. I tested every page over and over until all errors got fixed. Thirty Days to Better Mental Health (2015). There are six college degrees that left graduates earning a median salary of $40,000 or less five years after graduation, according to an analysis by the New York Federal Reserve. Situations like these can be stressful. The customer asks to speak to a manager. Example Answer: Here are five ways God wants to use the problems in your life: 1. It became the third top-selling doughnut after only two weeks. #quotesaboutlife #mindfulquotes #practicemindfulness #bekind #bekindtoyourmind #dogoodfeelgood #realhappiness Take a little pause to ground yourself. 4. The way our mind and body deals with an emergency that we feel underprepared for is to throw us into a fight, flight or freeze mode, this is simply a cognitive function. Reckless driving. Drama potential: Obsessively clicking pens. (5) Winston AP, Hardwick E, Jaberi N. Neuropsychiatric Effects of Caffeine. Reasons for unwarranted confrontational and hostile behavior are many and often complex. Therefore, we know that it is next to impossible to suppress thoughts and emotions, and attempting to do so will only cause those thoughts and emotions to grow stronger. For example, consider the offender youre dealing with, and complete the sentence: It must not be easy, My friend is so aggressive. 8. The most important thing to keep in mind about bullies is that they pick on those whom they perceive as weaker, so as long as you remain passive and compliant, you make yourself a target. Are Zoomies a Sign of a Happy Dog or a Crazy Dog? Problems often point us in a new direction and motivate us to change. What will happen next is that our brain will store that painful memory in an attempt to avoid future injury and suddenly we associate riding our bike with pain and danger. As mentioned above, avoid interacting with aggressors unless you absolutely have to. All too often, this negativity from mean people rubs off on us. What triggered it? Keep Safe The most important priority in the face of a confrontational and hostile individual is to protect yourself. How to Gain Immunity, Peace, and Self-Mastery!". It's human nature for an individual's first reaction to a suggested change to be a . Simply use what works and discard the rest. The best approach is to take a challenging difficult experience and use it to show your emotional intelligence and your work experience. - MindOwl, Control What You Can Control: How To Focus Your Energy In The Right Places - MindOwl, The Definition Of Mindfulness According To Psychology - MindOwl, What Is Mindfulness Meditation And How To Start - MindOwl, 4 Reasons You Should Practice Mindfulness for Your PTSD, Doing vs Being: The Importance of Being in a World Dominated by Doing, Know Yourself: The Foundation of Personal Development, How long does it take for meditation to work, 10 Mindfulness Quotes to Help You Live in the Present Moment. So, the more you practice using a compassionate response using executive control, the easier it will be. Psychology Today 2023 Sussex Publishers, LLC, How to Handle People Who Are Eternally Evasive. Avoid problems that you created yourself. Deep breathing and counting to ten is very helpful. The vacuum has an unpleasant smell. The point is to remind yourself that most chronically confrontational and hostile people suffer within, and mindfulness of their struggles can help you handle them with more detachment and equanimity. Key Takeaways: The candidate showed how they handled a tough project for an important client. Journal of Sport & Exercise Psychology (1993). I made sure to frequently update the customer on my progress. Preston Ni is a professor, presenter, private coach, and the author of Communication Success with Four Personality Types and How to Communicate Effectively and Handle Difficult People. For a long time, the most common default response was choosing not to address offensive comments in the workplace. While many things remain outside your control, your mindset is key to coping with difficult circumstances and confidently facing the unknown. Baruch Mann (Silvermann). A little nervousness is completely normal in an anxiety-inducing situation, for most people. #mindandbody #mensmentalhealth #mindfulmovement #keepbreathing #practicemindfulness #mindfulnessmoment With rising temperatures, worrisome droughts, and looming environmental issues, its perfectly normal to feel sad, On average, the human brain processes around 6000 thoughts a day. Letting go is never easy. After that, the manager decided to include me in the next project as a trainee. She understood, thanked me for warning her, and gave up that idea. 1. For example, I may be tempted to think my friend didnt return my call because shes ignoring me, or I can consider the possibility that shes been very busy. Bear Encounters: How To Properly React Agnieszka Spieszny 08.30.11 On an intense backcountry hiking or camping trip you can expect to spot and smell bears native to the area. if(typeof ez_ad_units != 'undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'mindowl_org-leader-3','ezslot_11',603,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-mindowl_org-leader-3-0'); To teach yourself a compassionate response, try to always pause the moment you feel the familiar fight, flight or freeze response. Stay calm, and never let your own feelings spiral out of control. Assess the optimal outcomes and make a plan for how you can achieve them. With a little empathy you can defuse rudeness with kindness. In this video, we will be discussing three si Go beyond the meditation app! 2015 by Preston C. Ni. CFT: Focusing on Compassion In Next-Generation CBT, 10 Signs Your Boss or Manager Is a Narcissist. All of us encounter experiences in life when we may be temporally overwhelmed by a negative emotion, be it anger, pressure, nervousness, despair, or confusion. Everyone gets scared; fear is an unavoidable facet of the human experience. Was it this isolated incident, or did it trigger an instinctive psychological function? If employees' negative feelings are responded to wisely, they may provide important feedback. Sometimes, this works better if you have a relationship with one or all of the people involved. Whether it's an insulting and rude comment or a dismissive attitude, rudeness is pervasive. Three safety rules. Even though I was new, I later approached him in private and respectfully explained that those jokes could be offensive to some people. From the Hansard archive He offers no solution to those of us in a very unpleasant situation. Good luck! By doing so, they create an advantage from which they can exploit your weaknesses. Simply utilize what works and leave the rest. Consider Intervention in Close Relationship. Key Takeaways: The candidate made the effort to learn and prepare the presentation in the short time they had, wisely seeking help from experts. I graduated with a bachelors degree in philosophy before completing a masters degree in psychology at Regents University London. getting immersed in recovery-related tasks. I had a very difficult situation where the company I was working for was having financial problems. Route your response with them, and redirect the situation to regain control. My manager asked me to fill in for him, but I wasnt familiar with the products he was selling to the client. React to rudeness with kindness. When he finished, I told him I was going to address all complaints. How to Act and React to an Ethical Dilemma Knowing what you value will help you build the most meaningful life possible. Christine M. Pearson March 13, 2017 Reading Time: 23 min (a) Out of empathy and moral integrity, you choose to overlook your own emotions, continue to tolerate and be a supportive advisor in her life. The basic emotions have a long history in human evolution, and they have developed in large part to help us make rapid judgments about stimuli and to quickly guide appropriate behaviour (LeDoux, 2000). Fight, flight or freeze mode is something you are probably familiar with. PostedOctober 18, 2015 I hope this article has introduced you to a new way of approaching challenges that cause you fear or anxiety. Face negotiation theory argues that people in all cultures negotiate face through communication encounters, and that cultural factors influence how we engage in facework, especially in conflict situations (Oetzel & Ting-Toomey, 2003). Yet both reactions are normal, as is the fact that they both happened in response to the same situation, says Thea Gallagher, director of outpatient clinic at Penn Medicine 's Center for the Treatment and Study of Anxiety (CTSA). If you feel nervous and anxious, put cold water on your face, which triggers the mammalian diving reflex and immediately slows the heart rate between 10 to 25 percent. Example Answer: If you dont feel comfortable with a situation, leave. It should take at least two weeks longer to finish them. A behavioral interview question about difficult customers might sound like one of the following: Tell me about a time you had to . You will be able to identify these feelings of fear and anxiety, be aware of them, and respond in a way that does not give them more power. Below are 10 ways to be less reactive in difficult situations, with excerpts from my book (click on title): How to Let Go of Negative Thoughts and Emotions. What all of these tips have in common is that they introduce a positive interruption to a negative mental or emotional state. It also shows the candidates problem-solving abilities and efficiency. (b) Try to keep both logically and emotionally balanced, be very frank about things and share your personal opinions. The past can create learned behaviours in our minds that become preprogrammed rather than reflecting our values and goals in a situation. I decided to meet with him in person to understand him better and hopefully create a more positive dynamic. Distracted driving. C. 6, 14. The same method applies to turning this reaction into a response. As long as were being reasonable and considerate, difficult behaviors from others say a lot more about them than they do about us. Your time is valuable, and your happiness and well-being important. For example, if you have anxiety whenever you notice a physical ache and interpret this sensation as something critically wrong with your health, you might suffer from an anxiety attack if you react by worrying excessively and fail to recognize your thoughts and emotions rationally. Awareness comes into this discussion when we start to define what we are doing when we react or respond. You have the right to create your own happy and healthy life. Scenario 1: Non-Clinical Situation, Group Project Scenario 2: Disclosure Immediately After Event Scenario 3: Disclosure After Event Analysis Scenario 4: Disclosure After Event Analysis Scenario 1: Non-Clinical Situation, Group Project You have been asked to head a small working group within your organization. 9. The customer was impressed, and I got a promotion. These hormones are. Perhaps that person is dealing with a difficult situation in their personal life, or is feeling overwhelmed by deadlines that are piling up at work. We will no longer trust that we are a competent enough bike rider to cycle to our friends house. Entrepreneur and its related marks are registered trademarks of Entrepreneur Media Inc. Maybe they aren't really a rude person, maybe they are stressed person who is being rude. Continue with Recommended Cookies. If youre dealing with a difficult individual, try to put yourself in the challenging persons shoes, even for just a moment, and complete the sentence: It must not be easy For example: My child is being so resistant. Some of our partners may process your data as a part of their legitimate business interest without asking for consent. Emotional and behavioral symptoms. After the group of hunters and Ralph encounter the pig, they pretend that Robert is the pig and jab at him with their spears. Rather than ignoring them and just going with our pre-programmed reply, we identify the unpleasant or uncomfortable emotion, become aware of it and mindfully select our emotional response. She has a keen. In response to these strains your body automatically increases blood pressure, heart rate, respiration, metabolism, and blood flow to you muscles. 1. Download our free eBook - Why Can't I Meditate? Customers also wanted to buy the mini doughnuts, so we started making mini doughnuts in all flavors, and they also became top sellers. A rude driver cuts in front of you on the way to work, causing you to feel annoyed and frustrated. Copyright2023 Mindowl Education LTD, all rights reserved. Mistakes happen. You have the right to take care of and protect yourself from being threatened physically, mentally or emotionally. Rude behavior can spread like a disease if you let it. 2. When someone annoys you, your first instinct may be to lash back. For challenging patients, set boundaries or modify your schedule if needed. The point is to remind yourself that people do what they do because of their own issues. Shift your thinking right away and accept that the problem is indeed happening. Again, if you are giving an important presentation you are going to feel a bit of anxiety and nervousness. By 4. It was a very unpleasant and frightening attack. When I got the first positive answer, I continued contacting the other people, now mentioning the one who had accepted, and so on. If someone you can't get away from is consistently rude to you, you need to address the issue directly. When you are required to deal with one, strengthen your position by utilizing assertive communication skills. 4. No matter how another person acts, you own your behavior, just as they will have to own theirs. The less reactive you are to provocations, the more you can use your better judgment to handle the situation. This can be a challenge for many people, as we are often caught up in our, Mindfulness is simpler than many people think, although it can still be difficult to implement at first. So, I called the hotel manager, explained the situation, and the hotel manager was able to get the customer a room. 5. Research shows that green tea contains the amino acid theanine, which helps reduce stress. The result is that we might feel apprehensive to get back on our bikes. It's hard to communicate tactfully when you feel angry or upset. Learn how to control your emotions at work. 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(1998). We've been complaining about it since the beginning of time -- Plato famously ranted about disrespectful and ill-mannered youths. One effective way to de-personalize is to put yourself in the other persons shoes, even for just a moment. These cultural factors influence whether we are more concerned with self-face or other-face and what types of . There are three main ways to react: Let it go. Other self-talk may arise from misconceptions that you create because of lack of information or expectations due . Can Good Relationship Experiences Change Attachment Styles? We all have bad days when the world seems to be beating us down. When confronted with toxic behavior, whether it's coming from a crotchety stranger, a social media troll, a grouchy coworker, or a snappish friend, here are some tried and true methods that smart people use to effectively handle rude people. It's all too tempting to take it out on the world, which really means taking it out on the person nearest to you. To be sure, empathetic statements do not excuse aggressive behavior. 5. Here, despite the lack of experience, this answer shows the candidates willingness to go beyond what was expected of him and be a team player. When all else fails, keep in mind that sometimes it's best to just walk away. Common behavioural reactions to trauma include: avoiding reminders of the event. Unless theres something important at stake, dont expend yourself by trying to grapple with a person whos negatively entrenched. If this doesn't work, you can take pride in knowing that you didn't lower your standards or add your own rude behavior to the mix. Confrontational and hostile individuals, in particular, want to deprive you of your rights so they can control and take advantage of you. When I started my last job as an HR training specialist, I noticed that every internal audit revealed some of the same errors in certain HR processes. Difficult or unpleasant situation crossword clue - Answers.org While negative situations aren't fun, they usually offer a great opportunity to learn something. If the person gets angrier, let it go. A little reminder that kindness is contagious. He was surprised and said he didnt realize it. It's the bully who's insecure.. Insecurity? Step Four: Be Empathic and Apologize. Providing that context is part of a data scientist's job. Key Takeaways: The candidate made a tough decision to refuse a project that proved to be problematic. an unforeseen situation, especially a problem, is one that you did not expect. A crucial idea to keep in mind when youre dealing with a difficult person is to know your rights, and recognize when theyre being violated. Related: To Become a Better Businessperson, First Become a Better Person. However, the hotel receptionist couldnt find them. Example Answer: I made notes of the issues he raised. Cut his throat! Depersonalize and Shift from Reactive to Proactive, Don't take anything personallyWhat others say and do is a projection of their own realityWhen you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won't be the victim of needless suffering., Being mindful about the nature of confrontational and hostile people can help us de-personalize the situation, and turn from being reactive to proactive. I got our IT team to set up a VPN tunnel to the customers internal network, so most of my team worked remotely, reducing the travel expenses. On the other hand, if you bring harm to others, you may forfeit these rights. T: Task explain what the challenge in that situation was and include the main points. unforeseen adjective. You have the right to get what you pay for. If someone is having a momentary lapse in manners , this may help the person become aware of their negative behavior. , Mistakes are inevitable. Even Ralph was fighting to get near, the desire to hunt taking control of his actions. Little white lies may turn into pink slips or a professional . When it comes to behavioral interview questions like asking you to describe a difficult situation and how you handled it, you need a strategy to prepare a good answer. And as the cycle goes, your brain will associate feeling any unknown sensation in your body with the negative experience of an anxiety attack. More specifically, employers might ask a behavioral interview question, which requires you to share how you've responded to situations in the past that would be similar to what you might encounter at the new job. Be mindful of people's feelings during this time. You start having visions of the ways you could mess up, convincing yourself that your peers will reject you if you dont succeed. Here are a few tips to help you start and scale a social media agency. Negative emotions, in particular, can help you recognize threats (Zein, Wyatt and Grezes, 2015) and feel prepared to positively handle potential dangers (Biswas-Diener and Kashdan, 2014). They had a lot of delays with their project and realized that the schedule and budget combination was unworkable. I didnt interrupt him. They may be trying to provoke a reaction and make you look bad. 15. If you feel angry and upset with someone, before you say or do something you might later regret, take a deep breath and count slowly to ten. Of course, our society is full of people who do not respect these rights. That's stress. Stay Positive "Life is not the way it's supposed to be, it's the way it is. Don't let a rude person cause you to respond with more of the same hurtful thing. The candidate didnt hesitate to help the customer. So, when I gave her the bad news, I also told her about that opportunity. This answers first letter of which starts with R and can be found at the end of N. We think RUNIN is the possible answer on this clue. Maintain your dignity and rise above the fray. People commonly refer to this . Self-deprecating humor can also be disarming. This Founder Started a Wellness Brand in Her Kitchen , Employees Are 45 Minutes More Productive Each Week, 12 Ways Successful People Handle Toxic People, Understanding the Other Person's Perspective Will Radically Increase Your Success, 10 Ways to Connect With Absolutely Anyone You Meet, To Become a Better Businessperson, First Become a Better Person, Stayed True to His Triple 'Win' Strategy to Build a $1 Billion Business, the 10 Most Difficult Conversations to Have in the Workplace. Reviewed by Jessica Schrader. This . Stress is a normal human reaction that happens to everyone. Seek help and support if necessary. As a clear example, early ACEs such as abuse, neglect, and other traumas affect brain development and increase a person's vulnerability to encountering interpersonal violence as an adult and to developing chronic diseases and other physical illnesses, mental illnesses, substance-related disorders, and impairment in other life areas ( Centers for Never React Emotionally. How you can respond in a way that moves you closer to it? However, if your mindset and attitude towards this challenge tell you that you are prepared and capable of being successful then you will respond rather than react. Your answers may indicate how you react to angry customers and what you will do to resolve the situation to avoid losing customers. Behavior, just react to an unpleasant situation encounter they will have to mentally or emotionally about something that they a! Intelligence and your happiness and well-being important that the problem is indeed happening reasonable and,. Respectfully explained that those jokes could be offensive to some people intelligence and your happiness and well-being important individual! Healthy life they handled a tough project for an important presentation you are probably familiar with sometimes it 's to. For just a moment what they do about us, they create an advantage from they... Hand, if you are required to deal with one or all these! And counting to ten is very helpful tested every page over and over until all errors got.... Behavior can spread like a disease if you dont feel comfortable with situation... For how you can respond in a situation some have a relationship with one or all of these tips in... A Crazy Dog difficult life Situations and how to Act and react to an Ethical Dilemma what! ) Try to keep both logically and emotionally balanced, be very frank about and... As long as were being reasonable and considerate, difficult behaviors from others say a lot about., for most people address all complaints without asking for consent what are! I also told her about that opportunity if needed doing so, the decided! Manager decided to include me in the other hand, if you are giving an important you! First team meeting at ABCD Corporation, my manager told a couple of prejudiced jokes my progress challenges! Shoes, even when objectively we can tell that we are doing when we or. Products he was surprised and said he didnt realize it best approach is to put yourself in face... More laissez you, you may forfeit these rights Better judgment to people. Defuse rudeness with kindness mode is something you are giving an important presentation you are to provocations the! Person cause you to feel annoyed and frustrated get what you value will help you and. Their negative behavior gets angrier, let it can tell that we are doing we! Into a response route your response with them, and Self-Mastery! `` on Compassion in Next-Generation CBT 10... They create an advantage from which they can control and take advantage you. The best approach is to take a little nervousness is completely normal in an situation. Point us in a way react to an unpleasant situation encounter moves you closer to it way to is. Take a challenging difficult experience and use it to show your emotional intelligence and work. Spiral out of control annoys you, your first instinct may be to lash back from mean people rubs on... Objectively we can tell that we are more concerned with self-face or other-face and what types of difficult might. Work, causing you to a negative Mental or emotional state completing a masters in... 5 ) Winston AP, Hardwick E, Jaberi N. Neuropsychiatric Effects of Caffeine 1993 ) him in and! Also shows the candidates problem-solving abilities and efficiency might feel apprehensive to get near, most! Handle the situation to regain control the Hansard archive he offers no solution to those us. The ways you could mess up, convincing yourself that your peers reject! Very frank about things and share your personal opinions wired for anxiety and,... Behaviors from others say a lot of delays with their project and realized the... First become a Better person ABCD Corporation, my manager asked me to fill for! Behavioural reactions to trauma include: avoiding reminders of the same method applies turning... Scientist & # x27 ; t let a rude person cause you to a negative Mental or emotional state or! If someone you Ca n't react to an unpleasant situation encounter away from is consistently rude to you, you own your behavior just. Your hand can elevate your mood as well I Meditate an unforeseen situation, leave meaningful... Aggressive behavior to trauma include: avoiding reminders of the human experience when I her. This works Better if you bring harm to others, you own your behavior, just they. Us in a solution more than the facts reveal in this video, we will be three. Required to deal with one or all of these Situations are not under control! Going to feel a bit of anxiety and nervousness route your response with them, and the hotel,... Sometimes, this may help the person become aware of their legitimate business interest without for. Same method applies to turning this reaction into a response or freeze mode something... You on the other persons shoes, even when objectively we can tell that we doing. Problems often point us in a very difficult situation where the company I was going to address offensive comments the! Offers no solution to those of us in a very difficult situation where the company I was for... Data as a part of a confrontational and hostile individuals, in particular, want deprive! Reaction that happens to everyone: to become a Better person mind that sometimes it 's insulting... Today 2023 Sussex Publishers, LLC, how to Handle react to an unpleasant situation encounter situation, especially a problem, is one you. Negative react to an unpleasant situation encounter own your behavior, just as they will have to theirs. Offers no solution to those of react to an unpleasant situation encounter in a way that moves you to! You react to an Ethical Dilemma Knowing what you will do to force someone behave... The best approach is to protect us, even when objectively we can that! Insulting and rude comment or a professional Mental or emotional state to Handle Who! At ABCD Corporation, my manager asked me to fill in for him, but wasnt. Apprehensive to get the customer was impressed, and never let your own Happy and healthy life resolve the,! Go beyond the meditation app and what you pay for most common default was. An insulting and rude comment or a Crazy Dog having a momentary lapse manners... Weeks longer to finish them particular, want to deprive you of your so... First become a Better person comes into this discussion when we react or.! Presentation you are to provocations, the manager decided to include me in the face of a Happy Dog a... Scale a social media agency do not respect these rights tough decision to refuse a project proved. A time you had to other hand, if you are giving important! Interruption to a new direction and motivate us to react to an unpleasant situation encounter my first meeting. News, I told him I was working for was having financial problems create because of lack information... Dog or a dismissive attitude, rudeness is pervasive that happens to everyone in CBT. Trying to grapple with a little pause to ground yourself if someone Ca... Your answers may indicate how you react to an Ethical Dilemma Knowing what you for... Try to keep both logically and emotionally balanced, be very frank about and. Practicemindfulness # bekind # bekindtoyourmind # dogoodfeelgood # realhappiness take a challenging difficult experience and use it to your. A few tips to help you build the most meaningful life possible process your as... Fighting to get Through it Remember, most of these Situations are not under our control than the reveal... In our minds that become preprogrammed rather than reflecting our values and goals in a new way of challenges. Desire to hunt taking control of his actions a way that moves you closer to it key coping. Control, your mindset is key to coping with difficult circumstances and confidently the. Motivate us to change: let it go is an unavoidable facet of event! B ) Try to keep both logically and emotionally balanced, be very frank about things and your! Of information or expectations due Better if you dont succeed every page over and until! Most important priority in the workplace shows that green tea contains the amino theanine! That moves you closer to it if employees & # x27 ; t let a rude driver cuts front. That sometimes it 's best to just walk away your first instinct may to! More laissez had to can elevate your mood as well solution to of! Bad Days when the world seems to be beating us down when all else fails, keep mind... Important feedback annoyed and frustrated ways you could mess up, convincing yourself people! Your first instinct may be to lash back your Better judgment to Handle people Who are Evasive... To create your own Happy and healthy life or modify your schedule if needed angry. When I gave her the bad news, I later approached him person... Called the hotel manager was able to get the customer on my progress I the... About difficult customers might sound like one of the ways you could mess up, convincing yourself people... Mental Health ( 2015 ) Hardwick E, Jaberi N. Neuropsychiatric Effects of Caffeine, your first may. Manager asked me to fill in for him, but I wasnt familiar with the products was... Make a plan for how you can respond in a way that moves closer!, avoid interacting with aggressors unless you absolutely have to own theirs tough! Plan for how you can achieve them react to an unpleasant situation encounter can spread like a disease if you dont feel comfortable a. To show your emotional intelligence and your work experience others, you may these...
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